Be Aware of Red Flags

What do you think of when you hear “Red Flags”? Do you think of sports? Chances are that relationships are not the first thing that comes to mind. Just like in sports, relationships have red flags, but these red flags are a little bit different. Red flags in relationships are warning signs that show your relationship can be abusive in the future. Below are some red flags that are common in unhealthy relationships:

·         Extreme Jealousy – At the beginning of a relationship, this might be seen as cute and romantic that a partner would get jealous when you talk to other people. If this jealousy is extreme and your partner tries to isolate you from your friends or family this can be a red flag.

·        Quick to Anger – It is expected that you and your partner will disagree at some point in your relationship. This is a natural part of any relationship. This anger can be a red flag when it does not take much to get your partner angry, or your partner gets extremely angry of little things.

·        Possessiveness – Just like jealousy, at first possessiveness can be perceived as something that is cute. Your partner might only want you to hang out with them, and this can lead to isolation from your peers. Sometimes abusive people treat their partners more like a property rather than a person, so if they are possessive it can be a red flag.

·        Extreme Mood Swings – Everyone experiences some type of mood swings in their lives, but when these mood swings negatively affect their partner this can be a red flag. This falls hand in hand with a person being quick to anger. If someone is always changing from happy to frustrated can cause tension to build over time.

·         Crossing Boundaries – This depends on the person and the boundary. Crossing some boundaries can be abusive. For example, crossing any kind of physical or sexual boundary is abuse. When it comes to other boundaries, it might be difficult. Maybe there is something you do not like to talk about, so if your partner constantly brings it up that can be crossing a boundary. Although it is not necessarily abusive, it can be a red flag in your relationship.

Keeping an eye out for red flags can help you determine whether your relationship is going in the direction that you want it to. If you have any questions about healthy and unhealthy relationships, you can explore our website or the Marjaree Mason Center website for more information. 

- Megan Oleski, Youth Education Specialist