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LGBTQ Relationships

8/04/2016

Often times it is a struggle to be different. This is especially true for the LGBTQ community. If you don’t know, LGBTQ stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer or Questioning. Studies have shown that abuse is just as common in LGBTQ relationships as it is in heterosexual relationships, but it is important to take note of some key differences.

LGBTQ couples may:

  • have a fear of being “outed” by their partner

  • have an internal feeling of isolation due to lack of support from others

  • feel as though they have to lie or hide sexuality to receive services

  • have difficulty finding supporting services

  • live in a homophobic home or community

With lack of support and acceptance, LGBTQ youth sometimes have nowhere to go, and no one to turn to. There are some myths that keep others from helping domestic violence victims who are in LGBTQ relationships.

It is a myth that:

  • only straight women get battered

  • when gay men fight it’s okay because “boys will be boys”

  • the abuser is always the more butch or masculine partner

  • transgender people are not real men or women

LGBTQ youth are especially vulnerable to mental illnesses such as depression, loneliness, and social problems, because they live in a society that stigmatizes and discriminates against them. It is often frustrating, confusing, and upsetting to be faced with great resistance from others.

How can you help your LGBTQ friends?

  1. Validate their sexual orientation or gender identity. Sometimes with all the backlash and intolerance all we want is to feel valid, real, and like any other person.

  2. Listen to what they have to say; let them know you’re there for them.

  3. Keep your conversations private unless someone is in danger. They might not be out and open about their sexuality or gender identity. It is important for them to be out on their own terms, and it will allow them to trust you.

  4. Don’t be judgmental or make them feel more ashamed.

Remember, everyone wants to be loved and accepted for who they are.

- Megan Oleski, Youth Education Specialist